Microkhan by Brendan I. Koerner

Entries from August 20th, 2009

Carbonated Vicodin in a Can

August 20th, 2009 · Comments Off on Carbonated Vicodin in a Can

We generally shy away from Red Bull, due to a bad experience we had after consuming four cans of the stuff one night. (Suffice to say our earthly vessel did not appreciate the deluge of taurine.) But perhaps we should reconsider our aversion in light of this Winona State study. Because Red Bull may have […]

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The Murder Project: Crocodile Tears

August 19th, 2009 · 4 Comments

We have to duck out for a few hours, to work on a big Wired piece that’s simmering on our front burner. Back as soon as possible; in the interim, please enjoy the above “gotcha!” clip of Dalia Dippolito, who was recently busted for trying to get her husband offed. Like so many murder-for-hire amateurs, […]

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“The Requirements to Compete as a Woman”

August 19th, 2009 · 4 Comments

In reading this quickie AP bit about a female runner whose gender is in question, we were left wondering about the shades of sexual grey that the International Association of Athletic Federations must contend with in the age of hormones. A quick peek in the pants, alas, is no longer sufficient to determine whether a […]

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Citrus is Your Friend

August 19th, 2009 · Comments Off on Citrus is Your Friend

Yesterday we touched upon medicine’s tendency to stick with certain treatments even when there’s a lack of credible evidence attesting to their efficacy. But there’s a flip side to that foible—some physicians’ genius for concocting cures on the fly, with no lab or patient data to assist them. Such was certainly the case with scurvy, […]

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First Contact: The Apache

August 18th, 2009 · 5 Comments

Mea culpa for letting our First Contact series lapse. It’s been nearly two months since we discussed Martin Frobisher’s encounter with the Inuit, and that’s far too long to do without primary-source accounts of the clashes of civilizations. But we’re back with a dandy today, courtesy of the Spanish explorer Francisco Vázquez de Coronado. Though […]

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Scared Sober?

August 18th, 2009 · 1 Comment

We don’t have too many hobby horses here at Microkhan, but one of them is a steadfast belief that many long-accepted practices are far less effective than advertised. This is typically because our species is easily seduced by logical facades, and thus pays too little attention to actual evidence. You can understand, then, why the […]

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A Raider for the Ages

August 17th, 2009 · 5 Comments

When the conversation turns to the all-time greats of kabaddi, the name Ameen Jatt must invariably be mentioned. The thick-bodied Pakistani raider was a dominant force in the 1990s, and still much-admired among the sport’s rabid fanbase: An awesome player, simply put out of this world! In 1995 World Cup he led Pakistan into the […]

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The Lakers of Poultry Judging

August 17th, 2009 · 1 Comment

We’re in the midst of working on a Wired piece about agricultural science, so you can expect Microkhan to dish up a plethora of farm-related factoids in the coming weeks. We’ll start today by highlighting a world us big city types know embarrassingly little about: the collegiate poultry judging circuit. Our journey began as we […]

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A Death Less Ordinary

August 14th, 2009 · 3 Comments

It’s probably a bit of stretch to file 1999’s Deep Blue Sea under our ever-popular Bad Movie Friday heading. While the premise of the film could scarcely be more ridiculous—hyper-intelligent mako sharks?—the sunken-laboratory thriller is not without its guilty pleasures. Chief among them is this classic scene, which features Samuel L. Jackson at his edgy […]

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Mortality as Morality

August 14th, 2009 · 4 Comments

We’ve yet to fully sort out our feelings about zoos. On the one hand, we obviously love us some exotic animals, especially those who occasionally turn on Man. (Yes, we’re macabre like that.) But the concept of captivity makes us more than a wee bit uncomfortable; we’ll never forget our last trip to the Bronx […]

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Where the Smoke Jumpers Are

August 14th, 2009 · 2 Comments

In the midst of trying to learn everything there is to know about the Air Tractor 802 “Fire Boss” model, we stumbled across one of the coolest data aggregators we’ve seen in eons: Pitney Bowes’ Fire Locator, which provides (almost) real-time updates on the nation’s raging wildfires. When you take it for a spin, we […]

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Ceausescu Through the Looking Glass

August 13th, 2009 · Comments Off on Ceausescu Through the Looking Glass

Richmonda, Virginia’s DJ Carlito specializes in digging up vintage, totally random vacation films and setting them to music. We’re absolute suckers for all things Romanian, so the above clip is a fave. But also check out Carlito’s found footage from Tunisia in 1967—not to mention this Indonesian propaganda flick from the heyday of (we think) […]

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Oil Non-Shock

August 13th, 2009 · 4 Comments

During out all-too-brief sojourn in St. Cloud, Minnesota, we caught wind of James Leroy Iverson’s release from North Dakota’s Missouri River Correctional Facility, after serving 40 years for a pair of 1969 murders. Iverson was, in fact, North Dakota’s longest-serving inmate, and thus a man unaccustomed to 21st-century living. What has shocked him the most […]

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St. Cloud Bound

August 11th, 2009 · Comments Off on St. Cloud Bound

By the time these words go live, we’ll be en route to beautiful St. Cloud, Minnesota for a whirlwind work trip. Odds are we won’t have a chance to blog while on the road, so no fresh posts for the next couple dozen hours or so. Take a break, enjoy some vintage Nas, and we’ll […]

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They’re Not Just Plot Devices Anymore

August 11th, 2009 · Comments Off on They’re Not Just Plot Devices Anymore

Last night, we got in a brief discussion with a pal regarding the Hollywood history of bearer bonds. These arcane financial instruments played a key role in at least two cinematic classics from our younger years: Beverly Hills Cop, in which Eddie Murphy’s pal foolishly steals some “German bearer bonds” from a drug dealer, and […]

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Beastmaster Errata

August 10th, 2009 · 1 Comment

Look, we’re big enough Mongolian monarchs to admit when we’ve goofed. And that’s exactly what appears to be the case with last week’s Bad Movie Friday post about the 1982 Marc Singer vehicle The Beastmaster. We riffed about Singer’s apparent refusal to save the life of the ferret that had just helped pluck him from […]

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All from the Comfort of Chihuahua

August 10th, 2009 · 1 Comment

Many moons ago at the Bronx Museum, we caught a great bit of satiric video art entitled Why Cybraceros?. We’ll let the artist himself, Alex Rivera, explain the riotous concept: In his second film, Why Cybraceros? (USA 1997), Rivera sarcastically imagined a future in which migrant farm workers (or Braceros) could work in America, but […]

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Who Will Slip?

August 10th, 2009 · Comments Off on Who Will Slip?

We find ourselves in full agreement with The Economist‘s argument against America’s draconian sex-offender laws, which prescribe too-harsh punishments for youthful blunders and other crimes unlikely to be repeated. But we were struck by this passage from the polemic, which would seem to undercut the magazine’s case: A meta-analysis of 29,000 sex offenders in Canada, […]

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The Sacrificial Ferret

August 7th, 2009 · 9 Comments

Whatever you may be drinking this weekend, please plan on pouring a little out for the heroic ferret in this classic The Beastmaster clip. We have no idea why Marc Singer’s character, supposedly a Dr. Doolittle-like friend to the animals, doesn’t try and help his rodent savior. But that’s just one of the many eternal […]

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A Bad Time to Get Bitten

August 7th, 2009 · Comments Off on A Bad Time to Get Bitten

We’ve long assumed that antivenins were stocked in every hospital pharmacy, so that snakebite victims need only worry about getting medical attention in time. But, alas, that’s really not the case at all—even mainstream antivenins such as CroFab must often be shipped in to address specific cases, and rarer remedies are getting increasingly hard to […]

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Zezo’s World

August 7th, 2009 · 8 Comments

Once in a while, we receive a comment that merits bumping to the front page. Such is the case with an anecdote just appended to this April post, in which we wondered about the fate of Charles Manson’s children—particularly Zezozose Zadfrack Glutz, the product of his carnal union with Susan Atkins. A reader chimed in […]

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“Scotch Taped with a Razor Blade…”

August 6th, 2009 · Comments Off on “Scotch Taped with a Razor Blade…”

There are two salient factoids that we’d like to pass along about the song above: 1) This was the first hip-hop 12-inch we ever purchased, from the Music+ retail store on Ventura Boulevard. (Don’t look for it—much like the Electric Banana, it’s not there anymore.) We were so enamored of the tune that we recorded […]

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Snipped by Disney

August 6th, 2009 · Comments Off on Snipped by Disney

The entertainment conglomerate behind Dumbo also recognizes that elephants aren’t always sweethearts—especially when too many pachyderms are competing for too few resources. And so Disney’s top veterinarian has spent the past few years traveling the globe, making sure that elephant populations stay within reason. His method? Straight-up surgical: Wildlife officials in several countries are considering […]

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The Fog of Plague

August 6th, 2009 · 1 Comment

With the Chinese town of Ziketan locked down on account of pneumonic plague, it’s worth looking back at a similar incident from 15 years ago: the Surat plague of 1994. The Indian city ended up recording approximately 5,150 cases of pneumonic plague, which resulted in a shade under 60 fatalities—by no means a major epidemic, […]

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Tilting at (Underwater) Windmills

August 5th, 2009 · 3 Comments

Apologies for the dearth of posting today. We’re hip deep in a pair of major projects right now, and we spent way too much time sorting through murder-for-hire data this morning. Now we’re off to cold call a bunch of Mexican scientists, who will doubtless chortle at our ugly Spanish. Wish us luck, and please […]

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The Murder Project: By the Numbers

August 5th, 2009 · 4 Comments

Bloggers are lazy? Microkhan chortles at that stereotype. We just wrapped up a long morning of analyzing FBI data, all in the name of furthering The Murder Project, our ongoing effort to assess the state of today’s contract-killing marketplace. And today’s verdict does not exactly lift our hearts. As mentioned previously, the only reliable pricing […]

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Farewell, Arena Football League

August 4th, 2009 · Comments Off on Farewell, Arena Football League

We can’t say we ever watched more than 90 seconds of an Arena Football game, so news of the league’s imminent demise didn’t exactly make us cry hot, salty tears. But 22 years is a long time for an upstart pro-sports league to make it—the likes of the USFL could only dream of achieving such […]

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The Filipino Route Around

August 4th, 2009 · Comments Off on The Filipino Route Around

Yesterday we looked at the economic benefits of the Philippines’ divorce ban. In doing so, we noted that while legal splits are certainly uncommon over there, they’re certainly not unheard of. Filipinos who want out of bummer marriages must opt for an annulment, which is ostensibly tough to obtain. But as is usually the case […]

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Prowlers of the Seven Seas

August 4th, 2009 · Comments Off on Prowlers of the Seven Seas

In keeping with our vow to consume lots of classic flicks while banging out Draft Two of the Now the Hell Will Start screenplay, we launched into the uncut version of Das Boot. We hadn’t seen the movie in about a decade, so we’d largely forgotten about its splendor. It’s tough to imagine a better […]

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Master at Work

August 3rd, 2009 · Comments Off on Master at Work

So we’re back to working hard on the screenplay, trying to bang out a second draft by (gulp) August 28th. To get in the right frame of mind, then, we’ve started watching a bunch of cinematic classics that have resided too long on our “must see” list. Chief among these was Akira Kurosawa’s Stray Dog, […]

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